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The story
A thread titled “I get it if you want to marry but can’t — but not wanting to marry just means you’re immature” was posted on the Nanji Jikkyō (V) board and drew 42 replies.
While some argued that choosing not to have children reflects “a lack of instinct” or “running from responsibility,” plenty of others pushed back, saying “being alone is comfortable” or “I’m choosing this precisely because I understand responsibility comes with it.” The debate over whether married or single people are more “emotionally mature” never quite converged, and some questioned the whole premise of judging someone’s character based on their marital status.
What people said
Exactly. Their sex drive stops right at… sex drive, and never goes anywhere beyond it.
Well, family members make up about half of all murder cases, so I guess that "stress" builds up plenty too (lol)
Babies are cute.
This. Watching my kid play the Famicom version of Mario brings back old memories.
Remarriage rates are actually higher for divorcees, you know.
Idiots probably believe that and use it as an emotional crutch.
Because the real reason is wanting their own time (scrolling on their phone, anime, manga, games). No purpose in life.
Feels like they're running from responsibility.
Immature people run away instead of marrying.
Says the unmarried, emotionally immature middle-aged guy.
Outside the big cities, Japan is basically turning into a developing country anyway.
Looks alone won't get you to marriage. There's real resolve involved, plus relationships with both families — you can't pull that off if you're immature.
Not only unpopular, but their standards are absurdly high — they're seriously gunning for idol-tier partners.
Ironically, running away means you're aware responsibility comes with it, so that's actually a sign of some maturity. Plenty of people out there marry and pop out kids casually precisely because they feel no sense of responsibility at all.
We're laughing at the immaturity of not being able to shoulder responsibility. A half-formed adult for life.
You keep saying "responsibility, responsibility," but what do you actually get out of fulfilling it?
Why do people end up thinking this way, I wonder. Does saying that actually protect them somehow?
People who want to hold themselves together make sweeping statements like this to convince themselves it's true.
Married guys who bash singles on Nanji-G (a 5ch sports-turned-general board) are even sadder, so honestly I'd rather they were single too.
Background and Key Points of the Debate
Threads like this keep popping up because Japan’s rising unmarried rate and trend toward later marriage have long been hot topics. But this particular thread isn’t really about statistics — it’s a value judgment about how to interpret people’s reasons for not marrying, and true to a live-discussion board, it quickly turned into an emotional back-and-forth.
The biggest sticking point is the definition of “immature” itself. Those defending the original claim link marriage and childbearing to “instinct” and “responsibility,” treating avoidance of them as immaturity. Those pushing back counter that choosing to keep your distance precisely because you’re aware responsibility comes with it is itself a sign of maturity, and ask whether it’s fair to call singles selfish while assuming every married person’s motives are purely selfless — exposing the double standard in the logic.
One thing readers shouldn’t take at face value: the claim floated in the thread that “80% of people who marry around age 20 end up divorced” is just an anonymous post on 5ch, with no source or evidence behind it. Even within the thread itself, this kind of sweeping claim was mocked as something “idiots believe and use as an emotional crutch” — it shouldn’t be treated as established fact.
※This article is an excerpt and summary based on the 5ch (Nanji G) thread ““I get it if you want to marry but can’t” — but “not wanting to marry” just means you’re immature.”
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