‘Your Deutsche Bahn Delay Joke’ Isn’t Funny Anymore — Sparks Debate on Overseas Forum

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The story

Deutsche Bahn (DB)’s chronic delays are a well-worn self-deprecating joke abroad too, but a railway journalist’s blog post arguing “that joke isn’t funny anymore” sparked a debate on the Lemmy community c/europe. While some pointed out that Germany ranks dead last among major countries for punctuality, and commuters shared their own experiences of frequent delays, a persistent counterargument held that “cars and planes are late too, so why single out trains?” The discussion also touched on a separate glitch in which DB’s official website was temporarily blocking access from Linux users, highlighting frustration that goes beyond a simple running joke.

“Your ‘Deutsche Bahn joke’ isn’t funny anymore”

Source: jonworth.eu / Original article here

What people said

2Anonymous2026-09-28 19:20
This just reads like an overlong Facebook rant… I was hoping for actual data, like delay rates per hour. That's the kind of thing that would back up the blogger's complaint and might actually change people's minds.
4Anonymous2026-09-28 20:00
I commute by train in Austria, and delays only happen with trains coming from Germany. I have a ticket valid on any train, so it occasionally works in my favor — like when an ICE rolls onto the platform two hours late and it just happens to line up with when I get off work.
5Anonymous2026-09-29 04:46
This guy is a German who's lived in Germany a long time, and he campaigns for EU-wide rail policy.
6Anonymous2026-09-29 06:04
I've been using DB for the past seven years, and delays over two hours I can count on one hand. But 30-minute to one-hour delays are genuinely common — it happens on about half my trips. For anything important, I make sure to travel the day before and stay overnight. The worst was a five-hour delay, caused by a signal failure between Frankfurt and Cologne.
7Anonymous2026-09-29 07:07
Re: #6
Then again, cars get delayed by traffic jams way more often than that… yet nobody complains about that.
34Anonymous2026-09-29 14:03
Re: #6
How many of those trips required a transfer?
9Anonymous2026-09-29 05:13
It was never a joke. It's always been an insult.
10Anonymous2026-09-29 06:47
There's a famous line about the nature of people who complain about German trains:

'Passengers never complain about a train that doesn't exist, because that train simply isn't there.'

Solution: just run fewer trains (joke)
37Anonymous2026-09-29 10:11
Re: #10
I wish that were just a joke, but they're actually doing it for real. That's exactly why so much rail infrastructure was lost through the '80s and '90s.
11Anonymous2026-09-29 03:40
Most of the time it's fine, but you can't rely on it. If the price were a third of what it is now — or at least half — I think people would complain less, since the service would actually match the price.
26Anonymous2026-09-29 07:08
Re: #11
Cars and planes aren't reliable either. Honestly, nothing is reliable.
12Anonymous2026-09-29 00:26
Re: #3
What a great day!
Sorry, but I honestly find it hard to believe a site would block requests just because the browser/client headers — `sec-ch-ua-platform` or `user-agent` — contain "linux" or don't contain "windows"… Also, I'm browsing the site just fine using Firefox and Chrome on a Linux distro. Mind if I ask how you confirmed it was OS-related?
16Anonymous2026-09-29 04:11
Re: #12
That was actually a real issue fairly recently. It's fixed now — DB itself admitted that blocking Linux users like that wasn't intended behavior.
17Anonymous2026-09-29 05:57
Re: #12
A journalist looked into it.

There's a German-language article and an English-language article (both linked).
I ran into the same issue myself when I tried DB's route search a week ago.
14Anonymous2026-09-29 08:24
I think that's a bit off the mark too. It was never a joke — at least not for commuters who have to deal with it two to five days a week. Sure, people say 'it's a joke,' but that's really just irony, a coping mechanism because otherwise you can't stand it — not an actual joke.
18Anonymous2026-09-29 06:01
Local public transit in cities is usually fine. Local public transit in rural villages is usually awful. And every German has at least one or two stories about long-distance public transit going spectacularly wrong.
27Anonymous2026-09-29 07:03
Re: #18
Sure, but I've also got stories about long-distance car trips going terribly. Yet there's no running joke about German roads being garbage.
20Anonymous2026-09-28 21:43
A few years back a friend was planning a trip to Germany and needed to travel between two cities. A quick search showed a regular train covering roughly 100-200 km cost about €60. Covering a similar distance on Spain's high-speed rail was about €20. I don't know if things have changed since, but back then, Deutsche Bahn looked like a joke.
24Anonymous2026-09-28 20:40
Re: #3
Couldn't agree more! The best sites are ns.nl or nsinternational.nl. Worth using even for trains that don't pass through the Netherlands.
25Anonymous2026-09-29 07:06
Re: #33
That's exactly why rail advocates rarely blame DB itself — they mostly blame the politicians.
29Anonymous2026-09-28 23:20
(Data from the link) According to this, Germany ranks 7th out of the 7 countries listed, with a punctuality rate of 58.5%. Though the original dataset apparently covers 11 countries, so there may be more countries that just didn't make the top-7 list.
30Anonymous2026-09-29 06:52
Re: #15
And yet you keep using DB instead of driving.
31Anonymous2026-09-29 08:37
Re: #16
On my Linux machine, I still get blocked if I search for a future date instead of today's travel.
35Anonymous2026-09-29 12:33
Yeah, exactly that.
36Anonymous2026-09-29 13:42
Re: #39
Compared to how bad DB is, nobody complains about the roads.
39Anonymous2026-09-29 12:07
Re: #7
'Nobody complains'?
…Wait, what are you talking about?

Background and key points of this discussion

The self-deprecating gag that “German trains are always late” is a familiar bit even in the English-speaking world, but Deutsche Bahn’s (DB) on-time performance has remained poor in recent years, and the data cited in this thread ranks it last among the seven countries compared (58.5%). Opinions in the thread split over whether this is something you can still laugh off as a joke or a genuine, harmful grievance: commuters testified that 30-minute-to-one-hour delays are an everyday occurrence, while others pushed back with “cars and planes are late too” and “the road network is just as bad, people just don’t complain about it.” Another point of discussion was DB’s official website blocking access that appeared to come from Linux — a real glitch that was also reported by overseas media (and has since been fixed). Note that the claim linking the delays to rail-infrastructure cuts in the ’80s and ’90s is one poster’s personal opinion, not verified data.

※This article is compiled and summarized from the 5ch (Lemmy c/europe) thread “Your Deutsche Bahn "joke" is no longer funny.”

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